hmm.okie.while waiting for laundry,fb lovell for quite abit..den he cannot take it liao jiu went to bed lo..yupps..felt really bad bout it..made him wait till 6 in e mornin den dint even get to tok to him at all..feel really horrible tat he dint slp just to wait for me..yupps.haix.

hmm..tings are not good..i dunno how to say..i seem to yi shen yi gui now..lyk everythin oso needa care..everythin oso dont believe even if he told me himself..but,i really aint wan him to feel lyk how he felt when he was wif yc..i dowan him to feel tat im so sticky and guan him in everyway..lyk..i dunno..tats y i nv say anythin and guan him in anyway.cos i noe he hates tat when ppl guan him..it'll irritate him big tym and e relationship wud only end up worst den it is now..

i aint wan him to feel irritated by me..i aint wanna be selfish..i aint him to feel lyk its a burden havin me as his gf..i aint wan him to feel irritated and raise his voice at me..i aint wan him to have 'shit,ive gotta tok/meet wif sandra!!!damn!!!'tis kinda feelin..i realised he wudnt tell me everythin and wud keep tings which hee tinks tat i shudn noe just lyk e day he went drinkin wif his clique and bro..if we werent tokin e next few days about it aft tat nite,i wudnt even noe bout it.i mean,it seems lyk im tellin him everythin..tings seems to have changed..i aint wan tings to turn out lyk tat..

hmm..its been lyk tis for almost 3weeks now i suppose?since b4 george came?roughly 2weeks-ish..haix..tis 2 weeks-ish ive tried to make tings go back to normal..tried to tok to him as if nth happened..im sure i did try..but,everytym,somethin new wud come up and make a mess outta it!but i kept tryin..im kinda emotionally tired..so tired till i cudn take it on e train.i really dint expect tears to roll down just lyk tat...tried and tried and tried..

havin tings gng on lyk tis for almost a month which is when his bro,doesnt hafta book in for a month..hmm.i suppose if hes bro dint hafta book in anymore in future,im afraid tings wud be worst den it is now.wif his bro next to him,tellin him tings lyk tat often,is enuff to change his tinkins,i really dunno..hmm.now it makes me feel as if hes feelins are already gone,everythin done now,are just for e word responsibility?i dunno..i dont see tings which wud happen months ago happenin now anymore..all of it seems soo far away from me...